Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Starting fresh

Each month bill day is so traumatic for me, that having the wretched task done gives a feeling akin to rebirth. It's a new beginning, a fresh start. Then my mind turns to how can I do something so INCREDIBLY spectacular this month that I will never have to face bill day again. This usually sets me off in a flurry of activity that is physically impossible to maintain. But this month... ahh, this month will be different.

I have pledged that this month I will work smarter not just harder. The goal this month is to video tape everything that we do here. Some of it will be used to give us a more impartial look at what we are trying to do. Some of it will go to YouTube. Some of it, I really, really hope, will be used to create a video library to teach different skills. Some of it will just be a diary of the progress that we are making.

I have so many plans!! I would , of course, like to start with the hobbit playhouse. After all, I'm a grandma, and grandmas are suppose to be good for things like that. Then I have to get on top of the horse fencing. The outdoor kitchen and the shop have to fall in line next. After that will be the wedding site. I'm especially excited about the wedding site!!! We've got a place in the woods that is fairly accessible and very pretty. The plan is to doll it up and build a rustic fireplace in and rent it for small weddings. Hopefully it will end up making a few mortgage payments.

The thing is this.... whenever I say I'm going to accomplish something here, I DO accomplish it!! It's kind of a little miracle, I think. So today I am making my declaration for turning my dreams into reality. Today is going to be a good day! Today I will make a good start.

So, yesterday was the once a month bill trauma. Today, is hopes and dreams and plans.... lots of plans! Tomorrow is Mac's visit back to Iowa City to see the Dr. It will be a gut wrencher, because it always is. If things go as usual, he will sleep on the way over. We will be sitting and waiting in one place or another for two hours. We will talk to Dr.s for about fifteen minutes, Then we will leave with another appointment for next month. On the way out Mac will ask me if I want to stop and eat. I will say no that I want to get the hell out of Dodge first. I never feel safe as long as we remain in Iowa City. I have to get some miles under me. Then we stop and eat in Des Moines on the way home. Mac will order food and then spend the next hour talking about all of the food that he misses and how much he wished stuff would start tasting good. Then we will get back in the truck and head home. Eventually we will pull onto our road. It is so small, and it's shaded. The trees reach over the road and touch and you feel like you are driving into different world. That will be the first moment when the stress starts to fall away. We will pull up the incredibly steep drive and see the lights in our wee house, and Mac will say, "We're home!" Then, only then, will we really feel safe and out of their reach.

The day after tomorrow I will make plans.


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