I have spent the weekend just beating myself up with all the things I want to see achieved. I have reflux! Time to calm down. It has struck me that tomorrow will be the first day of June... my garden still isn't completely planted! I haven't set a single new fence post! It's twenty days to summer equinox and then we start the downhill slide into winter again. That's disturbing.
I really want to get on with some projects... like a shed, or run in protection for the horses, or some perimeter fencing since Pip spends a good deal of the winter escaping from electric fencing, usually during an arctic event known as an Alberta Clipper.
So many pieces to the puzzle that I tend to forget the bigger picture.... the whole... the beautiful life that I am hoping to create. The beautiful life where Mac saying at 5:00 that he isn't hungry and then saying at 5:30, " Have you given any thought to what you're fixing for supper?" doesn't drive me to acts of violence.
I don't like feeling violent.... it gives me pains in my chest and stomach. It makes me crave a green, lush, peaceful life. Calm. A breath taking place.... yes, a breathtaking place that needs a shed, a garden and some good fencing. A place where people know how to go into the kitchen and open the fridge and put their own damn food on a plate.
Ahhh yes, peace, be still.