Monday, June 4, 2012

Such a Week!!!!

It has been one of those weeks where it is probably just best to put your blinders on and get through it. Like the cops in the old black and white movies...."Keep movin'. Keep movin". Nothin' to see here." The week should have started out with that feeling of excitement that comes from knowing you are almost out of school. A whole summer stretching out like a promise. Slow mornings over cups of coffee. Bonfires. Fresh tomatoes from the garden and the firm knowledge that you really don't have to do anything you don't want to.... within reason, of course. Instead, Mac stressed out about getting his sign out tasks done and turned into the office. The following day was a trip to Iowa City to see the oncologist/ transplant specialist. While sitting in the waiting room, we found out via e-mail that my uncle had died. He died of cancer. The weight of the visit intensified. The doctor's appointment went without a hitch, but Mac has a new medicine. He has had so much muscle wastage that they are trying another immunosuppressant and will try to get him off the prednisone as quick as they can. Getting new drugs instead of getting them taken away is always a bit depressing. It doesn't help that he is back to monthly visits. That idea alone has been tiring. Then there was my uncle's memorial service. One of life's little reminders that I really don't always understand other people. I kept having flash backs to my aunt's funeral, which was probably only a little over a year ago. I kept seeing her, in my mind, laying in the coffin, with a small ceramic lighthouse sitting on her chest. I did not know if she had started collecting lighthouses or if it was a spiritual metaphor. I never understood why it sat on her chest. My uncle, likewise, had knick knacks, but all were able to fit on the rim of the coffin. It makes me wonder if we are revisiting the thought processes of ancient Egypt. Maybe some folks think you can take it with you. Maybe my family just really likes knick knacks. I don't know.... I will stick to my own brand of weirdness. Then we came home. And this place, as always, provided me with a little miraculous healing. We sat and watched the birds outside the window. We took deep breaths. Then a really *BIG* thing happened. Mac said, "You know, I think I'm kind of feeling better. I think I want to start working on some projects outside this summer." I tried to hide my shock as he got some paper and pencil and began a list of projects he wanted to undertake. Yesterday we started on that list. We mowed. We weeded. We planted. We fed creatures. We picked up and sorted stuff around the house. We hauled debris to a bonfire pile. We cleansed ourselves with labor. We made more plans. This week is going to be so much better. It's just spreading out ahead of us... full of promise. Louie

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